opt – choose
Sicilian – a person who was born and raised in Sicily.
Sicily – largest island in Italy.
prefer - [pri-fur] wanted
rebuff –[ree-buhf] deny, reject, snub, turn down
committed - [kuh-mit-ted] do
threatened - [thret-n ed] to tell someone you are going to do something evil to them
A Sicilian man stole sweets and a packet of chewing gum so he could get arrested and spend New Year's Eve in a jail cell rather than be with his wife and relatives, Italian media reported on Friday.
The 35-year old Sicilian first showed up at a police station on Thursday asking to be arrested because he preferred spending the night in prison rather than with his family, but was rebuffed because he had not committed a crime, the Agi news agency said.
The man immediately went to a tobacco shop next door, where he threatened the owner with a box cutter as he grabbed a few sweets and a packet of gum. He then waited until police arrived to arrest him for robbery, the news agency said.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
WANNA CATCH A FLICK?
WANNA CATCH A FLICK?
A. Can you name the movie below? See how much information for each movie do you come up with.(Title, Genre, Director, Stars , Plot)
B. DIFFERENT MOVIE GENRE/MOVIE TYPES
( Can you think of an example for each movie genre?)
amnesia film horror science fiction
black comedy love triangle slapstick comedy
buddy film mistaken identity slasher film
coming of age film prison film tearjerker
dialogue-driven film puppy love unrequited love
historical drama road film
C. Vocabulary Enrichment
Did you know that the movie BOBBY is based on the real life of John F. Kennedy.
I heard that Julia Roberts used a body double for shots of her legs in PRETTY WOMAN.
Gene Hackman is my favorite character actor.
I don’t want to see Thelma and Louise. It’s a chick flick. Let’s go see Star Wars.
A lot of people didn’t like the movie Angels and Demons because the plot was hard to follow.
I don’t have time to listen to all your excuses. Just cut to the chase and tell me where your homework is.
I thought the ensemble cast in the movie OCEAN’S 11 did a wonderful job.
Those scenes in outer space in ARMAGEDDON were kind of far fetched.
I didn’t like all the blood in the movie SAW. It was too gory for me.
Leonardo DiCaprio became a megastar after Titanic.
I find that the sequel is not usually as good as the original.
D. Speaking Activity: Questions for Discussion
1. If someone made a movie of your life, who would you choose to play you?
2. Can a movie be a good source of knowledge? Do they promote a better understanding of the world?
3. If you had the chance to be in a movie, what role would you like to play? Who would you like to star with?
4. Do you think movies are too violent these days? Too commercial?
5. Do you think foreign movies have influenced Korean culture? In what ways?
A. Can you name the movie below? See how much information for each movie do you come up with.(Title, Genre, Director, Stars , Plot)
B. DIFFERENT MOVIE GENRE/MOVIE TYPES
( Can you think of an example for each movie genre?)
amnesia film horror science fiction
black comedy love triangle slapstick comedy
buddy film mistaken identity slasher film
coming of age film prison film tearjerker
dialogue-driven film puppy love unrequited love
historical drama road film
C. Vocabulary Enrichment
Did you know that the movie BOBBY is based on the real life of John F. Kennedy.
I heard that Julia Roberts used a body double for shots of her legs in PRETTY WOMAN.
Gene Hackman is my favorite character actor.
I don’t want to see Thelma and Louise. It’s a chick flick. Let’s go see Star Wars.
A lot of people didn’t like the movie Angels and Demons because the plot was hard to follow.
I don’t have time to listen to all your excuses. Just cut to the chase and tell me where your homework is.
I thought the ensemble cast in the movie OCEAN’S 11 did a wonderful job.
Those scenes in outer space in ARMAGEDDON were kind of far fetched.
I didn’t like all the blood in the movie SAW. It was too gory for me.
Leonardo DiCaprio became a megastar after Titanic.
I find that the sequel is not usually as good as the original.
D. Speaking Activity: Questions for Discussion
1. If someone made a movie of your life, who would you choose to play you?
2. Can a movie be a good source of knowledge? Do they promote a better understanding of the world?
3. If you had the chance to be in a movie, what role would you like to play? Who would you like to star with?
4. Do you think movies are too violent these days? Too commercial?
5. Do you think foreign movies have influenced Korean culture? In what ways?
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Vocabulary
pardon = [pahr-dn] forgiveness of a serious offense or offender.
former = [fawr-mer] preceding in order; being the first of two. The former president of South Korea.
convicted = [kon-vikt] to prove or declare guilty of an offense, esp. after a legal trial.
evasion = [i-vey-zhuh n] to escape or avoid something
bid = [bid] to invite
host = [hohst] a person who receives or entertains guests at home or elsewhere
granted = [grahnted] to give or accord; bestow
raised = [reyzd] to bring up or ask
yield = [yeeld] to give in, to give up
prominent = [prom-uh-nuh nt] leading, important, or well-known: a prominent citizen.
urging = [urj-ing] to endeavor to induce or persuade, as by entreaties; entreat or exhort earnestly
bidding = [bid-ing] to offer (a certain sum) as the price one will pay or charge: They bid $25,000 and got the contract.
against = [uh-genst] in opposition to; contrary to; adverse or hostile to: twenty votes against ten; against reason.
South Korea pardons Samsung's ex-chief Lee Kun-hee
The South Korean government has decided to pardon the powerful former chairman of Samsung, convicted for tax evasion, the justice ministry has said.
Lee Kun-hee is to be pardoned so he can return to the International Olympics Committee and help South Korea's bid to host the 2018 Winter Olympics.
Mr. Lee was pardoned on a separate funding conviction in 1997.
Presidential pardons are often granted to leaders of South Korea's large, family-owned businesses or "chaebols".
"This decision was made so that Lee could take back his place at the International Olympic Committee and form a better situation for the 2018 Olympics to take place in Pyongchang," justice minister Lee Kwi-nam told reporters, following a cabinet meeting that approved the latest pardon.
South Korea's Yonhap news agency said the pardon raised questions about the rule of law in a country where family-run chaebols still yield a lot of power.
Mr. Lee, 67, is widely regarded as the country's most prominent businessman. Trade lobby and sports groups had been urging the president to pardon him, Yonhap reported.
South Korea has tried two times so far to host the Winter Olympics in the mountain resort of Pyongchang, and is bidding again, against Munich in Germany and Annecy in France.
pardon = [pahr-dn] forgiveness of a serious offense or offender.
former = [fawr-mer] preceding in order; being the first of two. The former president of South Korea.
convicted = [kon-vikt] to prove or declare guilty of an offense, esp. after a legal trial.
evasion = [i-vey-zhuh n] to escape or avoid something
bid = [bid] to invite
host = [hohst] a person who receives or entertains guests at home or elsewhere
granted = [grahnted] to give or accord; bestow
raised = [reyzd] to bring up or ask
yield = [yeeld] to give in, to give up
prominent = [prom-uh-nuh nt] leading, important, or well-known: a prominent citizen.
urging = [urj-ing] to endeavor to induce or persuade, as by entreaties; entreat or exhort earnestly
bidding = [bid-ing] to offer (a certain sum) as the price one will pay or charge: They bid $25,000 and got the contract.
against = [uh-genst] in opposition to; contrary to; adverse or hostile to: twenty votes against ten; against reason.
South Korea pardons Samsung's ex-chief Lee Kun-hee
The South Korean government has decided to pardon the powerful former chairman of Samsung, convicted for tax evasion, the justice ministry has said.
Lee Kun-hee is to be pardoned so he can return to the International Olympics Committee and help South Korea's bid to host the 2018 Winter Olympics.
Mr. Lee was pardoned on a separate funding conviction in 1997.
Presidential pardons are often granted to leaders of South Korea's large, family-owned businesses or "chaebols".
"This decision was made so that Lee could take back his place at the International Olympic Committee and form a better situation for the 2018 Olympics to take place in Pyongchang," justice minister Lee Kwi-nam told reporters, following a cabinet meeting that approved the latest pardon.
South Korea's Yonhap news agency said the pardon raised questions about the rule of law in a country where family-run chaebols still yield a lot of power.
Mr. Lee, 67, is widely regarded as the country's most prominent businessman. Trade lobby and sports groups had been urging the president to pardon him, Yonhap reported.
South Korea has tried two times so far to host the Winter Olympics in the mountain resort of Pyongchang, and is bidding again, against Munich in Germany and Annecy in France.
Monday, December 28, 2009
Giftgiving
I. Vocabulary
drawers = [drawr] a sliding, lidless, horizontal compartment, as in a piece of furniture, that may be drawn out or pulled in order to gain access to it.
cobble = [kob-uh l] type of coal in lumps larger than a pebble and smaller than a boulder.
winding up = [wahyn-ding] leading to.
present = [prez-uh nt] gift
ornament = [awr-nuh-muh nt] an accessory, article, detail or any thing used to beautify the appearance of something to which it is added or of which it is a part.
premises = [prem-is es] a building together with its grounds. examples shop, store, school.
If your drawers are packed with the ghosts of Christmases past in the shape of unwanted gifts, a new Slovenian shop may be just the thing for you this year.
On a narrow cobbled street winding up to a mediaeval castle overlooking the Slovenian capital, Darilnica (the Gift Shop) opened this month as a place where Christmas, birthday, anniversary, indeed gifts of any kind, can be exchanged for something you do want.
Four young women - three architects and a public relations expert - decided to open the shop to make people think before giving presents, particularly at Christmas.
"People get and give too many presents nowadays so we believe there is a need for a shop where you can exchange gifts, so that every present gets an owner who will find good use for it," one of the four women, Masa Cvetko, told Reuters.
She was wrapping up an ornament, a crystal cross that one of the customers got at her wedding a few years ago. She never liked it and eventually brought it to the shop, where it was exchanged for a piece of soap someone else brought in.
"We set no price on the presents, one can take anything we have in exchange for any present they bring and there is no money involved," Cvetko said.
"We hope to make people think before giving a gift and make them give presents that mean something, that have a symbolic, personal value," she added.
Each present is put in a box, wrapped up neatly and placed under a large Christmas tree while its photo is put on the wall so people can choose presents from the photos.
In the first week since opening some 200 presents have been exchanged but more are expected to come in after Christmas and New Year, so the shop will stay open until January 8.
The women running the shop are not paid for their work and the premises were made available to them by the local community free of charge.
III. Comprehension
1. What did you think of the story?
2. Do you think people just give gifts without thinking about it?
3. Is opening a shop where people can exchange their gifts a good idea or bad idea? Why?
IV. Discussions
1. What was the best gift you received?
2. Describe to me your ideal gift.
3. Does a gift need to be expensive to be beautiful?
V. Essay
What do you think about this quote:
“You can give without loving, but you can never love without giving. “?
drawers = [drawr] a sliding, lidless, horizontal compartment, as in a piece of furniture, that may be drawn out or pulled in order to gain access to it.
cobble = [kob-uh l] type of coal in lumps larger than a pebble and smaller than a boulder.
winding up = [wahyn-ding] leading to.
present = [prez-uh nt] gift
ornament = [awr-nuh-muh nt] an accessory, article, detail or any thing used to beautify the appearance of something to which it is added or of which it is a part.
premises = [prem-is es] a building together with its grounds. examples shop, store, school.
If your drawers are packed with the ghosts of Christmases past in the shape of unwanted gifts, a new Slovenian shop may be just the thing for you this year.
On a narrow cobbled street winding up to a mediaeval castle overlooking the Slovenian capital, Darilnica (the Gift Shop) opened this month as a place where Christmas, birthday, anniversary, indeed gifts of any kind, can be exchanged for something you do want.
Four young women - three architects and a public relations expert - decided to open the shop to make people think before giving presents, particularly at Christmas.
"People get and give too many presents nowadays so we believe there is a need for a shop where you can exchange gifts, so that every present gets an owner who will find good use for it," one of the four women, Masa Cvetko, told Reuters.
She was wrapping up an ornament, a crystal cross that one of the customers got at her wedding a few years ago. She never liked it and eventually brought it to the shop, where it was exchanged for a piece of soap someone else brought in.
"We set no price on the presents, one can take anything we have in exchange for any present they bring and there is no money involved," Cvetko said.
"We hope to make people think before giving a gift and make them give presents that mean something, that have a symbolic, personal value," she added.
Each present is put in a box, wrapped up neatly and placed under a large Christmas tree while its photo is put on the wall so people can choose presents from the photos.
In the first week since opening some 200 presents have been exchanged but more are expected to come in after Christmas and New Year, so the shop will stay open until January 8.
The women running the shop are not paid for their work and the premises were made available to them by the local community free of charge.
III. Comprehension
1. What did you think of the story?
2. Do you think people just give gifts without thinking about it?
3. Is opening a shop where people can exchange their gifts a good idea or bad idea? Why?
IV. Discussions
1. What was the best gift you received?
2. Describe to me your ideal gift.
3. Does a gift need to be expensive to be beautiful?
V. Essay
What do you think about this quote:
“You can give without loving, but you can never love without giving. “?
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Annabel Lee
by: Edgar Allan Poe
It was many and many a year ago,
In a kingdom by the sea,
That a maiden there lived whom you may know
By the name of Annabel Lee;
And this maiden she lived with no other thought
Than to love and be loved by me.
I was a child and she was a child,
In this kingdom by the sea;
But we loved with a love that was more than love -
I and my Annabel Lee;
With a love that the winged seraphs of heaven
Coveted her and me.
And this was the reason that, long ago,
In this kingdom by the sea,
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
My beautiful Annabel Lee;
So that her highborn kinsman came
And bore her away from me,
To shut her up in a sepulcher
In this kingdom by the sea.
The angels, not half so happy in heaven,
Went envying her and me
Yes! that was the reason
(as all men know, In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee.
But our love was stronger by far than the love
Of those who were older than we
Of many far wiser than we
And neither the angels in heaven above,
Nor the demons down under the sea,
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee.
For the moon never beams without bringing me dreams
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And the stars never rise but I feel the bright eyes
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
Of my darling, my darling, my life and my bride,
In the sepulcher there by the sea,
In her tomb by the sounding sea.
It was many and many a year ago,
In a kingdom by the sea,
That a maiden there lived whom you may know
By the name of Annabel Lee;
And this maiden she lived with no other thought
Than to love and be loved by me.
I was a child and she was a child,
In this kingdom by the sea;
But we loved with a love that was more than love -
I and my Annabel Lee;
With a love that the winged seraphs of heaven
Coveted her and me.
And this was the reason that, long ago,
In this kingdom by the sea,
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
My beautiful Annabel Lee;
So that her highborn kinsman came
And bore her away from me,
To shut her up in a sepulcher
In this kingdom by the sea.
The angels, not half so happy in heaven,
Went envying her and me
Yes! that was the reason
(as all men know, In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee.
But our love was stronger by far than the love
Of those who were older than we
Of many far wiser than we
And neither the angels in heaven above,
Nor the demons down under the sea,
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee.
For the moon never beams without bringing me dreams
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And the stars never rise but I feel the bright eyes
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
Of my darling, my darling, my life and my bride,
In the sepulcher there by the sea,
In her tomb by the sounding sea.
Friday, December 18, 2009
The Chaos
The Chaos, by Charivarius (Gerard Nolst Trenité)
The Irregularities of English Spelling and Pronunciation
Composed by Dr. Gerard Nolst Trenité (1870-1946), a Dutch author and teacher, "The Chaos" illustrates many of the irregularities of English spelling (orthography) and pronunciation.
This is a classic English poem containing about 800 of the worst irregularities in English spelling and pronunciation
The Chaos
Dearest creature in creation, Study English pronunciation. I will teach you in my verse Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse. I will keep you, Suzy, busy, Make your head with heat grow dizzy. Tear in eye, your dress will tear. So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
Just compare heart, beard, and heard, Dies and diet, lord and word, Sword and sward, retain and Britain. (Mind the latter, how it's written.) Now I surely will not plague you With such words as plaque and ague. But be careful how you speak: Say break and steak, but bleak and streak; Cloven, oven, how and low, Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.
Hear me say, devoid of trickery, Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore, Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles, Exiles, similes, and reviles; Scholar, vicar, and cigar, Solar, mica, war and far; One, anemone, Balmoral, Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel; Gertrude, German, wind and mind, Scene, Melpomene, mankind.
Billet does not rhyme with ballet, Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet. Blood and flood are not like food, Nor is mould like should and would. Viscous, viscount, load and broad, Toward, to forward, to reward. And your pronunciation's OK When you correctly say croquet, Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve, Friend and fiend, alive and live.
Ivy, privy, famous; clamour And enamour rhyme with hammer. River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb, Doll and roll and some and home. Stranger does not rhyme with anger, Neither does devour with clangour. Souls but foul, haunt but aunt, Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant, Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger, And then singer, ginger, linger, Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge, Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.
Query does not rhyme with very, Nor does fury sound like bury. Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth. Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath. Though the differences seem little, We say actual but victual. Refer does not rhyme with deafer. Foeffer does, and zephyr, heifer. Mint, pint, senate and sedate; Dull, bull, and George ate late. Scenic, Arabic, Pacific, Science, conscience, scientific.
Liberty, library, heave and heaven, Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven. We say hallowed, but allowed, People, leopard, towed, but vowed. Mark the differences, moreover, Between mover, cover, clover; Leeches, breeches, wise, precise, Chalice, but police and lice; Camel, constable, unstable, Principle, disciple, label.
Petal, panel, and canal, Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal. Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair, Senator, spectator, mayor. Tour, but our and succour, four. Gas, alas, and Arkansas. Sea, idea, Korea, area, Psalm, Maria, but malaria. Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean. Doctrine, turpentine, marine.
Compare alien with Italian, Dandelion and battalion. Sally with ally, yea, ye, Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key. Say aver, but ever, fever, Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver. Heron, granary, canary. Crevice and device and aerie.
Face, but preface, not efface. Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass. Large, but target, gin, give, verging, Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging. Ear, but earn and wear and tear Do not rhyme with here but ere. Seven is right, but so is even, Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen, Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk, Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.
Pronunciation -- think of Psyche! Is a paling stout and spikey? Won't it make you lose your wits, Writing groats and saying grits? It's a dark abyss or tunnel: Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale, Islington and Isle of Wight, Housewife, verdict and indict.
Finally, which rhymes with enough- Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough? Hiccough has the sound of cup. My advice is to give it up!!!
The Irregularities of English Spelling and Pronunciation
Composed by Dr. Gerard Nolst Trenité (1870-1946), a Dutch author and teacher, "The Chaos" illustrates many of the irregularities of English spelling (orthography) and pronunciation.
This is a classic English poem containing about 800 of the worst irregularities in English spelling and pronunciation
The Chaos
Dearest creature in creation, Study English pronunciation. I will teach you in my verse Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse. I will keep you, Suzy, busy, Make your head with heat grow dizzy. Tear in eye, your dress will tear. So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
Just compare heart, beard, and heard, Dies and diet, lord and word, Sword and sward, retain and Britain. (Mind the latter, how it's written.) Now I surely will not plague you With such words as plaque and ague. But be careful how you speak: Say break and steak, but bleak and streak; Cloven, oven, how and low, Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.
Hear me say, devoid of trickery, Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore, Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles, Exiles, similes, and reviles; Scholar, vicar, and cigar, Solar, mica, war and far; One, anemone, Balmoral, Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel; Gertrude, German, wind and mind, Scene, Melpomene, mankind.
Billet does not rhyme with ballet, Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet. Blood and flood are not like food, Nor is mould like should and would. Viscous, viscount, load and broad, Toward, to forward, to reward. And your pronunciation's OK When you correctly say croquet, Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve, Friend and fiend, alive and live.
Ivy, privy, famous; clamour And enamour rhyme with hammer. River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb, Doll and roll and some and home. Stranger does not rhyme with anger, Neither does devour with clangour. Souls but foul, haunt but aunt, Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant, Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger, And then singer, ginger, linger, Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge, Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.
Query does not rhyme with very, Nor does fury sound like bury. Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth. Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath. Though the differences seem little, We say actual but victual. Refer does not rhyme with deafer. Foeffer does, and zephyr, heifer. Mint, pint, senate and sedate; Dull, bull, and George ate late. Scenic, Arabic, Pacific, Science, conscience, scientific.
Liberty, library, heave and heaven, Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven. We say hallowed, but allowed, People, leopard, towed, but vowed. Mark the differences, moreover, Between mover, cover, clover; Leeches, breeches, wise, precise, Chalice, but police and lice; Camel, constable, unstable, Principle, disciple, label.
Petal, panel, and canal, Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal. Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair, Senator, spectator, mayor. Tour, but our and succour, four. Gas, alas, and Arkansas. Sea, idea, Korea, area, Psalm, Maria, but malaria. Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean. Doctrine, turpentine, marine.
Compare alien with Italian, Dandelion and battalion. Sally with ally, yea, ye, Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key. Say aver, but ever, fever, Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver. Heron, granary, canary. Crevice and device and aerie.
Face, but preface, not efface. Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass. Large, but target, gin, give, verging, Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging. Ear, but earn and wear and tear Do not rhyme with here but ere. Seven is right, but so is even, Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen, Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk, Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.
Pronunciation -- think of Psyche! Is a paling stout and spikey? Won't it make you lose your wits, Writing groats and saying grits? It's a dark abyss or tunnel: Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale, Islington and Isle of Wight, Housewife, verdict and indict.
Finally, which rhymes with enough- Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough? Hiccough has the sound of cup. My advice is to give it up!!!
Let's Face It. English Is a Stupid Language.
A friend of mine e-mailed this to me and I had a good time reading the post.
It's a funny commentary where the author describes the ambiguities of the English language.
Enjoy!
Let's Face It. English Is a Stupid Language
by: Anonymous
There is no egg in the eggplant,
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England,
French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted, but if we examine its paradoxes we find that:
Quicksand takes you down slowly,
Boxing rings are square,
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing?
If the plural of tooth is teeth,
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth?
If the teacher taught,
Why hasn't the preacher praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables,
What the heck does a humanitarian eat?
Why do people recite at a play,
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways?
How can the weather be as hot as hell on one day
And as cold as hell on another?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language where a house can burn up as it burns down,
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
English was invented by people, not computers,
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all.)
That is why:
When the stars are out they are visible,
But when the lights are out they are invisible.
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts,
But when I wind up this poem
It ends.
It's a funny commentary where the author describes the ambiguities of the English language.
Enjoy!
Let's Face It. English Is a Stupid Language
by: Anonymous
There is no egg in the eggplant,
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England,
French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted, but if we examine its paradoxes we find that:
Quicksand takes you down slowly,
Boxing rings are square,
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing?
If the plural of tooth is teeth,
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth?
If the teacher taught,
Why hasn't the preacher praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables,
What the heck does a humanitarian eat?
Why do people recite at a play,
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways?
How can the weather be as hot as hell on one day
And as cold as hell on another?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language where a house can burn up as it burns down,
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
English was invented by people, not computers,
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all.)
That is why:
When the stars are out they are visible,
But when the lights are out they are invisible.
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts,
But when I wind up this poem
It ends.
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